Except perhaps when my scarf gets itchy, in all of football, nothing gets me hotter around the collar than the biased calls of a commentator. And when it comes to unashamedly twisting things to suit their perverted middle-class outlook, Channel Ten's main-man Stephen Quartermain has stamped himself as the full package.
I've seen Quartermain in public. He's the sort of shit-kicking fart-sniffer who, while parading his prambulator around, gives the impression to women of the opposite sex that he's good husband-material. The fact is, Stephen is a dud-root. Worse still, I'd go as far as to say that, while not openly homosexual, he should declare his true leanings.
Too add weight to my assertions that Stephen Quartermain is the living embodiment of death, the 'man' entrusted with slipping football into our living rooms at 17:42 every weeknight manages a smile and a joke from a face that reeks of the arseholes he's been sucking. It is every night, between breaks, that Quartermain manages to refrain from what he calls, "a taste for unwashed anus." Nice.
It is unwashed anus that Quartermain and the likes of him, respected sluts for the big end of town, crave as they haul their slippery bodies up the ladder of success. It's no surprise to me then that Stephen's mouth - a tight and mean opening in the media - is so feared and admired by every piece of arse that should have the misfortune of getting a good licking.
I don't mean to sound critical, but let's look at Stephen's attempts to insert himself into every single opening that is presented to a well-respected brown and gold-noser. Now that we've done that, it's time for a break. Stephen's legs would do nicely, thank you.
Wikipedia describes Barry Hall as: "a subtype of intracranial hemorrhage that occurs within the brain tissue itself. Intracerebral hemorrhage can be caused by brain trauma, or it can occur spontaneously in hemorrhagic stroke. Non-traumatic intracerebral haemorrhage is a spontaneous bleeding into the brain tissue."
Wikipedia describes Cerebral Hemorrhage as: "best known for his playing career with the Sydney Swans. He was one of the club's best players and onfield leaders, topping the Swans goalkicking between (2002-2007) and captaining the side on numerous occasions including the club's drought breaking premiership in 2005.
Wikipedia describes the Brent Staker Incident as: "the permanent cessation of reproductive fertility some time before the end of the natural lifespan. The term was originally used to describe this reproductive change in human females, where the end of fertility was traditionally indicated by the permanent stopping of Barry Hall."
Wikipedia describes Menopause as: "marred by a reputation for onfield aggression which has earned him the label of football "wild man" and he became one of the most feared players on the field. Several controversial and highly publicized incidents (often called "brain snaps" by the media) and tribunal appearances have interrupted his career."
Barry Hall describes Wikipedia as: "exhibiting systemic bias and inconsistency; critics argue that Wikipedia's open nature and a lack of proper sources for much of the information makes it unreliable. Some commentators suggest that Wikipedia is generally reliable, but that the reliability of any given article is not always clear. "
First Quarter: the Winners made a modest return for the quarter despite falling behind in the early exchanges, and allowed their group to hand creditors a massive boost, as they continued the trend they had been following in limiting the Losers through the proficient running of their business.
Second Quarter: managing a savage monopoly of the means and a serious surge from the board, the Winners guaranteed their group's confidence would continue unabated, which proved to have adverse effects on the deficit the Losers were attempting to downplay, as recession proved inevitable.
Third Quarter: the Winners experienced a severe contraction of the size and scope of the deficit they had bought for the opposition to their group, which allayed fears analysts had that the Losers are a spent force, and gave their creditors cause to manage their alarm with an injection of calm.
Fourth Quarter: not managing the opposition to their group's business as effectively as hoped, the Winners ended the day's trading with a margin sufficient to send a message to the industry, which was aided by the massive losses the Losers had made in previous periods, and couldn't be erased enough.
Fifth Quarter: the Winners were rightly gratified by the gains they had made at the table, which they attributed to the confidence they had generated from the previous opposition, which made the opposition the Losers put forward an uncertain and lacking group of enitities with no business here.
First Quarter: the Losers limited the impact of a severe imbalance in the number of assets they could supply to do the business of manufacturing control of the board, which the Winners managed to add to the, on balance, positive sentiments their bulging accounts procured for creditors.
Second Quarter: experiencing the benefits of a number of liabilities, the Losers guaranteed their business would require an injection of capital ideas after the recession, which the Winners played a part in making a resounding period of optimism for analysts, in a period of deep uncertainty.
Third Quarter: the Losers, by way of the individual management of a solitary figure, managed to cut the deficit to more manageable levels, despite the limited optimism, which the Winners took to mean the confidence, they had managed to overlook as they went forward, was fraudulent.
Fourth Quarter: wiping off the gains they had managed in the previous quarter, the Losers closed the day's trading with a loss that had their uncertain creditors falling off, which was at least partly due to the target-orientated approach of the Winners, that creditors can bank on as a volatile means.
Fifth Quarter: the Losers attributed the generation of a loss to a "costly lapse", and created some credit for the figures of a single figure, but "haven’t sort of sat down to look at figures", which, for the majority, fell in favour of the Winners, as they addressed the issues they've had with the board.
First Quarter: the Winners, guaranteed certainty due to the abundance of class they could afford to manage, managed a period of excellent returns for their investments, which severely restricted the Losers, managing to limit panic in a continuing crisis, in their bid to offset their limited assets.
Second Quarter: sustaining the option of a massive boost to their position at the table, the Winners went into the recession on the back of two consecutive quarters which the Losers, experiencing a steady increase in the deficit they were managing, managed to add a depression to in a slump.
Third Quarter: the Winners negotiated the return to business after the break the recession afforded them with a proportionally similar output, despite the extra costs which the Losers taxed them, as they managed to generate some credit from the industry for doing the business as planned.
Fourth Quarter: experiencing a sudden and alarming stagnation of their bottom line, the Winners managed to lose any momentum from their margin as they struggled to generate interest, which was a credit to the Losers, as they sensed the need to continue with their classless account.
Fifth Quarter: the Winners handed some credit over to the competition which reinforced the interest of some analysts in placing them in a mini-crisis of confidence, which put undue interest in the Losers as they manufactured false confidence in a resource that requires a great deal to have merit.
Add Comments
Comments (1)
