Carlton, Senior Listed Player, 2009, Setanta O'hAilpin
Setanta O'hAilpin, a big fat ugly head on his big fat hairy shoulders, would have you believe that he wouldn't go through your belongings when you looked away. That's why he's the one to watch when you're half-asleep, or drugged.
The Hair: you can't tell me you don't spend hours in front of the mirror. I don't. And behind. Double-sided. A few out of place. Africans in Ireland. Black to absorb the light. Sneak around under the cover of night. All of a sudden.
The Teeth: just a hint of acknowledgement. Greets with a smell. Breath like a slut's underwear. Wouldn't harm a fly. Tortures fleas. Get stuck in the teeth. Ruminates. Strung up by the leg. Blunt. At least a couple of guts. Benign.
The Skin: half from mum and half from dad and half from Uncle Francis. Heals itself. Protein. Breaks the seal. Hit on the head. Take the knife. Run it along the throat. Pull the head back. Make a mistake. The body's still breathing. Pass.
Ludwig Wittgenstein says: "I knew Hitler at school when we were both just a couple of homosexual Jewish intellectuals. People can say what they like about him, but at least he was honest. Nobody likes someone who doesn't believe in anything. Fags."
